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These people who encourage you to confess to your little liaisons will also tell you in the next breath, that infidelity is a horrible act that causes divorce and destroys trust. So there you have it, a paradox, you either destroy your partner’s trust, to earn it (by being 100% honest) or be dishonest and keep the trust. Obviously the second choice is the more appealing one.
But I think we should look at why society continually insists that we be truthful with our family when it concerns a topic that can greatly hurt our loved ones and destroy the relationship. A most bizarre view, when at the same time we are encouraged to lie to our family members in other circumstances. Take Christmas for example, society encourages and expects that we all will lie unrelentingly to our children, and for the majority of families, this will be the case. We do this because it makes our children happy. Has any parent ever told their child that their beloved Santa is a myth?
It’s a natural cycle. You lie to your children to keep them in ignorant bliss, so why not to your spouse? A huge benefit of the latter is that there isn’t a worldwide conspiracy against your spouse. Every adult that your wife or husband meets won’t be in on the secret, so the chances of them discovering it from someone else is slim. You wouldn’t ruin the trust your children have in you, so why do the same to your spouse?
I guess ensuring that they don’t find out all comes down to how well you can sneak around in the middle of the night without waking anyone up! (and if you do, presents go a long way..)
